Are you soon to become a new parent again or for the first time, if so when you first find out that you are pregnant two things will happen, either you want to jump for joy and share your news with the world or you’ll be filled with fear and uncertainty about what will happen next.
Becoming a parent is way more than caring for a new baby and showing oodles love and affection, most parents to be, get caught up in this idea, which is a great start. The real work however for a new mum or Dad is knowing how you will cope when your baby won’t sleep at 3 am and you’ve fed, changed and tried everything you can to soothe your infant. At this point, you are desperately tired, yet out of ideas and wondering how your partner has somehow managed to blissfully sleep through all the commotion.
It is amazing how often men and mothers, though less so; can continue to sleep through when their child is awake or crying out for something and refusing to settle for hours on end.
When this situation continues you start to measure each other’s responsibilities’ and the number of tasks you’ve both done. The thing is, this is not a game and one or both of you end up ‘fed up’ especially as there are no prizes. Once you are faced with the same performance again you go for the easiest option, even if it goes against your better judgement, you desperately do anything to get some sleep. I even know of couples who’ve actually paid their partner to get up in the night to settle their child when it was their turn, through sheer exhaustion.
That’s how bad it gets at times. If you are a new parent, have you considered what are you going to do to protect yourself from getting into these kinds of situations? If sleep is not the issue it may be feeding or doing the chores as well as managing childcare and work too. What can be done to ensure that your relationship stays ‘intact’ and you remain loving partners towards one another and not just your child?
The best way to keep your relationship and family life flowing beautifully is to learn how to communicate and express your needs. When you do this well everything feels calm and you all get more sleep and enjoy each other’s company without any competition or resentment building. In my work with families, I start by working out what both mum and dad want, when that is sorted, we look at what your child is not happy about and then we can build a plan that addresses everyone’s needs and keeps your family life in that calm, loving, blissful state the majority of the time.
If you are feeling nervous about the arrival of your new baby and you want to share your thoughts to gain a better perspective of what to expect when your baby arrives or how to manage a toddler and your infant let’s get on a call and discuss which package may be right for you so you can look forward to your new situation with full confidence and be proud of your actions, as your home life is exactly as you wish it to be. To book a consultation apply here juliet@sanitynanny.com and then you’ll be able to jump for joy because you’ve taken the first step in your new future.