Going out for family meals or Sunday lunch is a real treat for most mothers to give her a break from looking after the baby or brood of young children, for some though it can be filled with dread and fear. What if your child decides to have a tantrum or does not like the food on offer, what do you do, do you only go to a restaurant that serves food you know your child likes or do you go somewhere your partner likes to keep him happy?
At the w/e I was treated to a lovely meal and enjoyed a wonderful Sunday roast, the first table we were offered felt a bit ‘open’ so we asked to move and were given a more comfortable place to sit in and enjoy the ambience. Ten minutes after this, it all changed the table next to us was swarmed upon by a family with a baby and three more children. The mother placed the baby near me, did she sense I would be ok with her youngest next to me or did I have a sign saying, ‘test me out, I’m the Sanity Nanny’? As it happened, the mother was apologetic about the onslaught and hoped we didn’t mind, things soon settled down and we got on with eating our food.
About 15 minutes later, the children’s father turned up and sat next to one of his daughters, when the baby started playing up, she was obviously hungry he gave her a menu and failed to notice that it had dropped on the floor. Fortunately, the chips arrived for a sibling and when the food went in she was happy babbling again. I couldn’t help thinking what a big feat to cope with, going out for lunch with four children in a fairly small restaurant.
This poor mother had charge of the four children and when the eldest managed to lose her burger which landed under the table, it was Mum again who got up to pick up the pieces. While this was being resolved, the three year old managed to spill his apple juice over the table and on to the bag of the lady sat at the other table.
Fortunately the lady didn’t make a scene or get too upset, but I did notice throughout all this commotion and children sat with their parents that Daddy did nothing to help, which leads me to ask, why have so many children when you aren’t going to be involved with them and let your wife do all the work?
My friend told her son he had seven sisters, which put mum at ease. I presume they had a nanny in the week and it must have been her day off. Surely this is the time for Mums and Dads to connect and support each other. Mum only ordered a salad, I guess she knew it would end up being cold if ordering hot food. She was no doubt living on nervous energy, doing the best she could but I couldn’t help wondering, what was going on inside for her and why did she not get more help from her husband. He didn’t even carry the baby seat to fix in the car.
What message is this giving to their children about how men and women behave and what will they do when they grow up and get married?
If you need to talk about your family challenges and how to get more support with childcare matters, get in touch here www.sanitynanny.com